Monday, 16 April 2012

Jimmy Corkhill's Photographical Review of The Grand National

So, after my blog about how to Keep It Scouse At The National went down such a treat, with over 7000 views, I thought I’d take the time to do a Photographical Review of all the disasters that failed to take my advice, and rocked up and made bad shows of themselves:

Here goes:

Exhibit a) Not too bad a start, decent outfits, decent figures .. then OH MY GOD what is the face on that third one? The one in the tan?  Looks like the Birkenhead Tranny’s twin brother:

Exhibit b) No clue what’s happening here.  Are they feather earrings or is it a feather boa or did something just crash land in her chips or what?

Exhibit c) Lad? What the actual fuck? Really lad?  Why?  Actual WHY?   
Never seen anything as queg in my life.

Exhibit d) So .. this bird has fallen head first through the Gypsy Wedding dress maker’s shop.. Then her 3 year old messed around with it a bit.. and then her fella placed the pearl necklace on there?  Bad state.

Exhibit e)   WHAT is this on the right???  Looks like she’s had off a Pimp .. robbed his coat and hat ??  Has she no mirror? Has her friend no tongue? Really?

Exhibit f) What an absolute belter this is.  Some lad has actually let his Ma out the house looking like that.  There are so many things wrong with it.. I can’t even begin.  She reminds me of an old Crown Street prozzy I affectionately nicknamed Candle Wax Face.

Exhibit g)  Told you this would happen didn’t I?  Shoes off, tears.. vomming.. Making a bad mess of yourselves.  Bet yer fella still isnt talking to you is he love?

Exhibit h) Dear Lord...  someone’s Ma here taken a turn for the worst.  Can you imagine??!  Our Jackie got herself in that bad a state one time and I never forgave her. Ended up noshing a bizzy the utter whore. 
Our Lindsay was fumin.

Exhibit i)  Tight shiny suit -  check ...  Sunnies – check ... Being an ABSOLUTE WHOPPER-  check...

Exhibit j)  These two have GOTTA be from Wigan?  Nice saggy nips there, bird in the pink top.

Exhibit k) Just put her down and put those thunder thighs away... Tree trunks.  Also check out the GORGEOUS steward in the background

Exhibit l) Now what did Uncle Jimmy say about Panto Dame crossed with Gypsy Wedding?

Exhibit m) I don’t even need to say anything for these two do I ?


Exhibit n) Here we go .. shoes off.. snarling down the  to your fella coz he has swerved you.   
Told you, didn’t I ?

Exhibit o) And last but not least .. this utter buffoon of a man always has to gegg in doesn’t he. Does that cardigan / coat thing actually have Buffalos on it? Really lad?


  1. Jaysus Jimmy, yer a man of the people

  2. I'm laughing sooooooo much. Bang on Jimmy :')

  3. Didn't I see you wearing something like this when you were skidding on the jizz in the curzon toilets with Fred the weather man?

  4. Pity your grammar is so poor - did you get copyright for these pictures? Maybe someone will be suing you soon !

  5. Looks interesting, ill be sure to check it out. Cheltenham tips

  6. You call a woman thunder thighs yet she looks absolutely gorgeous. No wonder women and young girls obsess over their image when there's arseholes like you criticising them. Thing is though those women can lose weight if they choose to. You'll always be a prick.

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  8. Who are you to judge people and try an have a laugh at their expense! Does it make you feel better about yourself when you put other people down?

  9. Brilliant.....thanks for making me laugh out loud at half five on a Sunday morning lad.